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More Perplexing Articles . . .

300th Article Finds Us Less Perplexed & Nearly Speechless
Posted Monday, June 07 @ 03:00:00 PDT by Brendan
Wow, it's hard to believe but it's true, we've got 300 articles on the books already. Seems so long ago I was reporting the discovery of my feet but day after day they just keep adding up and here we are, go back and count 'em if you don't believe me.

Old Friend Gravity You've Really Outdone Yourself
Posted Sunday, June 06 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Brendan
Up and down just wouldn't be the same without his faithful place in my life drawing me ever closer to the firma of terra, but he really sharpened his game when he taught me that "slide" actually has two meanings.

New Guy Consumes Entire Office Diaper Budget
Posted Saturday, June 05 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Brendan
Oh man, we're out of money again and it took me all afternoon to figure out where the dollars went. Now that I've gotten to the bottom of the bottom line and it's all reading red I'm rosy in the mug seeing where all the ducats went.

Crying-Wiggling Beats Crying, Hold the Wiggle
Posted Friday, June 04 @ 03:00:00 PDT by Dominic
Hey, I learned the coolest trick. I haven' even had any instruction in the matter, yet I've totally learned this one good. Instead of just crying while crying I've invented the fine art of crying while wiggling. That's right, you heard me, wiggling.

Alternative to Self-Wetting Discovered
Posted Thursday, June 03 @ 03:00:00 PDT by Brendan
Bed wetting can be the biggest shame to any child, but it's a crime I've very rarely committed and it's never been my fault. "Why?" you may sagely inquire. Right tools for the right job, folks. I have a moisture leeching diaper.

Mitts Return After Someone Scratched My Face
Posted Wednesday, June 02 @ 03:00:00 PDT by Dominic
All my life I've worn normal clothes, you know like trunk-sacks, stocking caps and of course oven mitts. I outgrew the mitt phase for a bit but "somebody" kept scratching my face so now they're back on the arm-tips again.

Man I Love a Silly Hat
Posted Tuesday, June 01 @ 03:00:00 PDT by Brendan
I like shoes a lot and don't mind wearing clothes so much but when it comes to anything decked about my skull I just couldn't be much more thrilled. sure, I could be more thrilled, but not much.


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