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More Perplexing Articles . . .

Goof Time Adjusts Perspective, Inverts
Posted Saturday, July 30 @ 01:00:00 PDT by Brendan
I work pretty hard at bringing the news to my teaming swarms of fans, I guess, but if you redo the math by age or weight (even on account of my beefy thigh stubs) I'm the hardest working kid in the biz by a mile. Sometimes I just need to relax, unwind, adjust my perspective and, oh yeah, invert my perspective too.

Post-Apocalyptic Theme Party a Real Riot
Posted Friday, July 29 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Brendan
As a pseudo celebrity I've oft been invited to (and attended) a wide range of cutting edge theme parties. I make few qualms about it, I take most every invitation and crash it with entourage in tow. I've seen them themed across the spectrum, but these "post-apocalyptic" parties confuse even my own limited sensibilities.

Filler Story Arrives, Re/Disappoints
Posted Thursday, July 28 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Dominic
In the thick of our leanest content days here about these perplexing offices of Perplexing Times I foolishly begged an assignment as if to prove I can fill in like frosting between the tasty slabs of cake. Let today stand as the finest example. I'm roughly incapable of mocking up just such filler.

Perp Times Behind, Jr. Hands Still Tied
Posted Wednesday, July 27 @ 15:00:00 PDT by Dominic
With our official office budget as oralfically low as I'd ever care to teeth upon, I know our staff resources are stretched Laffy Taffy thin. We've fallen behind in scribble-dee bits and snappy-doo shots but no one's called on me to help, and I can.

Kid Satire Crippled by Short-handedness, Not Shortness
Posted Tuesday, July 26 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Brendan
As tall folk and carnie-style rides both insist, I'm a sub-short journalist and, indeed, even a short person. Lately we've grown infamous for falling painfully behind on our lifelong legacy of reporting breaking news, opinions, editorials and reviews on a daily basis but it ain't because Im short, I promise.

Dragons Extinct, Dragonology Endangered
Posted Monday, July 25 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Brendan
I had a super chance to squeeze in some field experience time this week to finish off my most recent internet studies. I'm on the cusp of completing my e-degrees in Dragonology and Dragononomy, but dragons and their studies' demise concern me.

TeleTubbies Fascillating
Posted Sunday, July 24 @ 02:00:00 PDT by Dominic
I was never much for being entranced by the televisory Hypno-Box, not even with all the clever commercials" all slogan jingly as they are. All the things I've learned in life I've learned from the boob tube, and what I now know is that Teletubbies are perfectly normal and totally fascillating.


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